


Thou Shall Eat Dust

by MagnetoTheMagnificent



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Biblical Scripture References (Abrahamic Religions), Crowley is Bad at Feelings (Good Omens), M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-06-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:54:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24507988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagnetoTheMagnificent/pseuds/MagnetoTheMagnificent
Summary: Crowley was punished twice. The first time was when he Fell, the second when he was in Eden.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

Aziraphale watched Crowley intently as he picked at his dessert.  
"Crowley, my dear," he startled Crowley from his staring.  
"Yes, angel?" Crowley looked up.  
"Why don't you ever eat?" Aziraphale finally asked.  
"I do!" Crowley protested, crossing his arms defensively.  
"Yes, dear, but you never seen to enjoy it, and I know it can't be the quality of the food because the food here is marvelous."  
Crowley shook his head in defeat.  
"Can't taste," he mumbled before taking a gulp of his wine.  
Aziraphale's eyes widened. He had not expected that answer.  
"Crowley?" he asked with concern.  
"Yea?" the demon answered, annoyed.  
"What do you mean you can't taste?"  
Aziraphale put a hand on Crowley's, who tensed.  
"I mean I can't taste. Never could," Crowley muttered, "I s'pose I could once, b'fore Eden and all that mess. S not like I had anything to taste, though."  
He looked away from Aziraphale, whose face was lined with worry.  
Aziraphale hasn't thought much about what happened in Eden. He had known Crowley was the serpent, but he never questioned what happened before, or after, the event. They had spoken on the wall, and Crowley seemed as nonchalant as ever.  
"What happened in Eden?"  
"Oh, y'know. Couldn't get away without some sort of punishment. We were all punished, y'know," Crowley explained, trying to sound unbothered.  
Aziraphale knew Adam and Eve were punished. They were expelled from Eden, Adam was cursed to work tirelessly, and Eve was cursed with labour pains. It never occurred to him that Crowley was also punished. He suddenly wanted to wrap Crowley in a tight hug.  
"What was your punishment?" he quietly asked, moving to be closer to his friend.  
Crowley bit his lip.  
"Burned my tongue. Kinda like Moses, y'know? S why I have thiss little lisssp," he shrugged, "and why everything I eat tastes like dust."  
"Oh, Crowley," Aziraphale murmered, pulling the demon close.  
"I didn't know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the Midrash (commentaries), Moses was tested by Pharoah as a boy. Two trays were placed in front of him, one with dull but precious jewels, and the other with glowing coals. Pharaoh was afraid Moses would usurp him, and if he chose the jewels, he would know he seeks power (basically, Moses took Pharoah's crown). If he chose the coals, he would know Moses was only a child attracted by shiny things. Moses initially reached for the jewels, but an angel moved his hand to touch the coals. He burned his hand, and immediately he put it in his mouth, burning his tongue. He had a lisp from then on.


	2. Chapter 2

Back at Aziraphale's bookshop, Crowley was strangely quiet.  
"What does it tasssste like?" Crowley asked, his head nestled in Aziraphale's lap.  
"Hmm?"  
"What does food taste like?" Crowley repeated.  
Aziraphale looked down at Crowley.  
"Well," he began, running a soft hand through the demon's curly hair.  
"It has all sorts of flavours. There's sweet," he planted a kiss on Crowley's forehead, "like waking up and finding the love of your life next to you."  
Crowley smiled under Aziraphale's loving gaze.  
"There's salty," Aziraphale continued, stroking Crowley's cheek, "like tears shed after a nightmare."  
"There's sour," he added, pulling Crowley up so he was practically cradling him, "like that unpleasant feeling when encountering Beezlebub or Gabriel."  
They both chuckled at that.  
"There's also spicy," Aziraphale said slyly, "for when you're feeling particularly devilish."  
He tickled Crowley, who jumped in surprise.  
"Angel!"  
Aziraphale laughed as he corned Crowley on the couch.  
"Let offf!"  
Aziraphale pulled Crowley in for a hug.  
"Can you taste this?" he asked, kissing Crowley tenderly. Crowley melted in Aziraphale's embrace.  
Crowley may not have tasted it, but he sure felt it.


End file.
